MOVIE REVIEW: Vincent Reviews The CrapFest That Is "Baby Driver"

Baby Driver is a terrible movie.

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I'll start off by saying Baby Driver has received widespread, universal acclaim and sits at 97% on Rotten Tomatoes. But everyone who says they enjoyed this movie is an idiot.

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To begin, the star's name is actually Baby. He is constantly called and referred to as "Baby." Well this is ANNOYING AF cuz he's a DUDE and the only real Baby was Jennifer Grey in Dirty Dancing

So every time they say "Baby" in this movie, which is often, I couldn't stop thinking about Dirty Freaking Dancing! Nobody puts baby in the corner or behind the wheel!

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Music plays a big part in this movie. This dummy Baby likes to listen to music while he drives the getaway car. Okay. Fine. Whatever. 

But it begins to become a go-to, a crutch, a played out trope. It's used far too much and too often. And in several scenes, bullets coming out of guns are synced with music. Huh?! Just dumb.

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This movie is completely contrived. None of the bad guys are believable. No one says anything remotely real. Everyone is overacting to the Nth degree. 

You don't care about any of the characters. I cared a tiny amount about Baby ending up with his waitress gal pal, but not really. I could give 2 craps about what happens to anyone in this stupid movie.

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There's a couple of whiz bang car chases in the beginning. Exciting! Then lots of talking and narrative and planning, plotting, set up, and concerns are voiced. Then 1 more action scene at the end ZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

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Style is paramount in this flick. So much so that it detracts from the movie so you're never fully enveloped by the story, plot, or characters. 

The director Edgar Wright has personality, and he lets you know it by spewing it constantly all over the screen. Bleh. Whatever.

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Speaking of the end, it's dumb. You think Jon Hamm is killed several times, but he keeps coming back. And back. And back. And OH WHO CARES ANYMORE JUST END THE FREAKING MOVIE! (Spoiler Alert.)

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Crap. Drek. Trash. There is nothing redeeming in this movie. I doubt even the people who liked this movie will ever watch it again.

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-Vincent Nicholas, The Indifferent Film Critic

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Bonus Movie Review: I also watched Wonder Woman. I was super tired and super sleepy so I slept thru most of it and was only awake for about 30-45 minutes. But when I was awake, it was a rollicking good time! Seemed like a good flick.

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1 More Thing: Sean and I love the new Century 14 Theatre in Arden Arcade cuz of their sweet luxury recliner seats and assigned seating. It's all new and fancy.

And, shockingly, the prices are in line with pretty much every other movie theatre out there. They could charge a couple bucks more for the premium experience, as far as I'm concerned, and I wouldn't mind paying up.

But the Baby Driver was not there. So we went to Regal Cinemas in Natomas. It's an older theatre. A mediocre experience. Their seats suck. But they still charge $12 per ticket! What a rip off. Anyways.

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